If you read my blog, you know that I’m a firm believer that laughter increases happiness and joy and has positive effects on our health and well-being.
You also probably know that I’m a professional writer. One of my latest projects was editing a humorous book for Col. Charles H. Booth, Jr., known to his friends and family as “Chuck.”
Chuck is 95-years-old, although you’d never guess it. Sharp as a tack and full of energy. He survived as a combat pilot during World War II and has seven children, 19 grandchildren, seven great-grandchildren, four stepchildren, and seven step-grandchildren.
This businessman and philanthropist has many friends that send him emails full of jokes and decided he would take the best of them and publish his very first book.
Here is one of the many jokes from his book, The World’s Funniest Internet Jokes, especially timely with New Year’s Eve just around the corner:
Due to the increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA’s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you’re whispering when you are not.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with breath that could knock a buzzard off a dead animal one hundred yards away.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to disappear.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to assault you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can hold a logical conversation with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer, and smarter than some really, really big guy named Psycho Bob.
Did Chuck make you chuckle? If you want to read more jokes from his fabulous book, you can check it out on Amazon.
So not it’s your turn. What’s your favorite joke? Please share in the comments below!